This Book is just asking for a Dramatic Reading

An "ex-gay" activist named Joseph Sciambra wrote a book called Swallowed by Satan. He went on Bryan Fischer's radio show to promote it. The book is basically about his journey out of homosexuality, Neo-Nazism, and Satan worship. Because Neo-Nazis are generally known for being gay friendly. Yeah, I'm already a little skeptical about the validity of some of his claims.

Mr. Sciambra was a gay porn star with drug abuse problems. He also claims to have been obsessed with female pornography and visited female brothels for his nights of drug-addled debauchery. He started sleeping with men because women "did not have the physical strength for the type of abuse" he needed.

I'm going to let the man speak for himself when he describes his sexual encounters with men. Bet yourself $10 that you can read this following passage without cracking a smile:

"Satan swallowed me whole. I would spend a decade in his gut. Miraculously, a protective layer prevented my full destruction in the digestive tract of the devil. When my continued presence in his bowel became an irritant, I was passed out onto the street. To be stepped upon and washed away into the gutter."

Pay up, folks.

Throughout most of the book, Mr. Sciambra describes his sex encounters with other men in lurid detail. He claimed that he heard voices of demonic spirits telling him to engage in kinky sex acts. In one story, after a gang-bang, he described conceiving a demon in his anus. No, seriously. You might want to skip past this next quote if you have a weak stomach:

"All I could think about were the magical claims by occultist Alester Crowley that anal sex released a rare form of demonic spirit. In fact, he taught that these devils would be conceived within the anus during sodomy. I believed this wholeheartedly. I wanted these entities to take me over…Then, with no warning, a rush of liquid gushed from my body. It was slimy and mixed with blood. I gave birth to devil I prayed for. In the coming years, it would grow and pitilessly hover about me."

I don't know why we still have satire. I mean, you can't parody this! There is no way to make this more absurd.

Mr. Sciambra also mentions a few other things. He mentions joining a cabal of gay male witches and having group sex with a man with "the head of a goat or ram." Huh. Maybe he just stumbled upon the furry fandom and thought it was a cabal.

This books sounds like it will be entertaining. Perhaps Kirk Cameron will play Mr. Sciambra in the movie adaptation?