Intellectual Rap Lyrics: We Be Steady Mobbin

This is a new, more satirical series for my blog that I'm hoping will catch on. I'm also thinking about making it a YouTube video series as well. Basically, I take a rap song and translate the lyrics into something more appropriate for people with an education. First up is Lil Wayne's "We Be Steady Mobbin'"

Verse One
Sir, copulate with these unruly black men
I'm going to let everything live but these unruly black men
Take the bayonet off my AK and cut these unruly black men

And have sexual intercourse with these disagreeable women
I believe I care about everything but these disreputable women
I don't care so I say "so what" to these unlikable women
And I put Young Money on a significantly higher platform than these repugnant women

If it isn't broken, please do not break it
And if he isn't shaken than I will shake him

I hope I don't appear to be weak
Because when a wolf cry's wolf,
You can still see that wolf's teeth,
Repulsive man who engages in indecent relations with his own mother

I have a futurist handgun
If you act disagreeably I'll shoot you three times
I'm in your face like a certain French luxury cosmetics company
You black people are more vulnerable than Roseanne's son
You cannot reach me on my Samsung phone
Because I'm too busy having sexual relations with the world
And sticking my tongue out to the Universe

I am a mentally unstable man in an indecent affair with my mother
The crazy about it is that I was born like this
I'm on 36th Street getting high off of all these bricks of cocaine

Author's Note: That line was really hard to do as I have no idea what he's supposed to be saying in the actual lyrics

I've got a big house with 10 bathrooms and I could defecate all day

Hook:
We don't want any trouble
You're a thug, but what is a thug compared to a kingpin
Kane Beatz produced this song so I'll give him a really vague shout out
I goof off and murder a black guy and leave parts of his brain matter on the street
I make a girl climax
I bring her to my bedroom and I make her climax
And we are devoting our lives to cheap hedonistic thrills
Oh my friend, my hobby is spending large amounts of money

Verse Two:
How are things going, I'm a gangster named after an Italian fashion brand
Ask my fellow rapper Tity Boy who likes to shoot up the city (?)
Excuse me, but I wear lots of diamonds so I only wear designer brands
"Gucci Mane keeps defecating on me; why is he purchasing jewelry"
I'm pulling the trigger in East Atlanta
I put bandanna's on my car antenna
We do not talk to strangers
We just cut off the fingers of these black men
I have a significant amount of guns and I an dangerous; also I deal drugs
I will shoot you with my AK-47 anywhere above your ankles
My gun is the size of Nia Long; my clip is as long as a Pringles can
I have Desert Eagle, so for some reason you should think I'm a fan of the Philadelphia Eagles
I also have a sniper rifle and I'm going to kill you with it; Toni Braxton song reference
Copulate with that black man, kill that black man, resurrect him and than kill him again

Verse Three:
Money is the motive
Be unwise with the money and things will get ugly
I've reloaded; you better pull the trigger if you point your gun at me
I'll buy a pound of marijuana and somehow put it all in one joint
I can generate my own light with my swagger
I have an anorexic girlfriend who doesn't even eat rice
But would you believe that she's a lesbian?
She asked me for jug so I hit her three times
I am the man around this person who engages in indecent relations with his mother
I generate so much heat that your skin will darken around this person who sleeps with his mother
This musical genre; I have my hands around this person in an illegal relationship with his mother
I said, "game" but I am not playing around this person who Freud would have a field day with
I am the best to ever do it, uncouth female
You're the best at not doing anything
If you're the fecal matter than I am the underground waste disposal system
Mess with me and your people will be reading eulogies
I promise you cannot start trouble with me
But I can engage in carnal relations with your girlfriend and make her climax
Then she'll be my prostitute, my hit girl, and my robbery partner
And it will be your money that we steal
Then I'll kill that unseemly trollop and send her body back to your derrière.

Hook:
We don't want any trouble
You're a thug, but what is a thug compared to a kingpin
Kane Beatz produced this song so I'll give him a really vague shout out
I goof off and murder a black guy and leave parts of his brain matter on the street
I make a girl climax
I bring her to my bedroom and I make her climax
And we are devoting our lives to cheap hedonistic thrills
Oh my friend, my hobby is spending large amounts of money

Outro:
Take a clip of bullets down your throat
Don't spit out the bullets, eat them
I'm the rap music genre equivalent of a follower of Karl Marx
Life is a gamble and it's all about my poker chips
Do you want a form of this medicinally?
I will make the most of this
F is for "ferocious" (which is a vague pun on one of my many nicknames)
Assassinate all your business partners
The top is appropriate
This is just where I belong
Keep a dense phallic region for girlfriend to shake on