Monday, December 23, 2013

Weird State Laws #5: California

California. It vies with Texas and Florida for the title of weirdest state in the country. It has elected two movie stars to the governor's office. Countless shows and movies are filmed there, including many set in the midwest, resulting in the amusing spectacle of mountains and palm trees in Chicago.

California also has some very weird laws, as we're about to find out:
 California prison workers will no longer be able to have sex with inmates
They just made this illegal recently? Was it a common occurrence for the guards and the inmates to bump uglies? Were the prison wardens going through a mid-life crisis and decided that they needed a little danger in their sex lives?
You may only throw a frisbee at the beach in Los Angeles County with the lifeguard's permission.
Some kid must have been hit with a frisbee and got knocked out and then drowned in a foot of water when none of the hundreds of other people on the beach tried to rescue him. I think the lawmakers misdiagnosed the problem on that one.
No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour
Remember kids, if you want to go for a ride without a driver, keep it at 55.
In San Jose and Sunnyvale it is illegal for grocery stores to provide plastic bags
The Paper Bag Gestapo must be very strict about enforcing this law.
Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses
I guess the people in the LA Region don't know that the state of California extends further north than Fresno.

Here's some laws at the local level.
In Blythe, you are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you own at least two cows
Some lawmakers are way too literal minded.
In Burlingame, it is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds
Well, baseball is our national pastime. I don't mean to be hyperbolic, but if they didn't include that provision, they'd be fascists.
In Arcadia, peacocks have the right of way to cross any street, including driveways.
Appalling. They give that right to peacocks, but not to flamingoes? What makes the peacocks so special?

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